Accidental Brownie

This recipe doesn't come with any photos, sorry, because it didn't actually start out as a) brownie or b) for my blog! I was actually intending on making this recipe here. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), I quickly discovered that our new blender, as amazing as it is, isn't actually a good replacement for the dying food processor that I threw away. As such, all the nuts and dried fruit just ended up in a big solid lump around the blender blades. So I decided to improvise, add more liquid, and turn it into a brownie batter...and OMG, I think it was actually one of the best examples of paleo baking that I've come up with!

Ingredients

100gms 85% dark chocolate (melted)
1 cup (not packed) soft dates
1 cup of nuts (I used cashews and hazelnuts)
1/2 cup shredded coconut
2 tbsp coconut flour
1 tsp baking soda
3 eggs
3 tbsp Dutch cocoa
250 ml (1 cup) coconut cream

Basically, just throw all the ingredients into a blender and blend until the mixture becomes a smooth batter.

I then baked it at 180 degrees celsius, in a square cake tin lined with baking paper. I can't remember how long I cooked it for, sorry, but I think it was probably about 30 minutes. You'd want the top to bounce back when you push it gently.

Public Service Announcement

Ok, listen up y’all – this is a really, really, really important announcement.

I AM SORRY

That’s right, this is a public apology. I am sorry - very sorry.

As I was typing out the recipe for my paleo pumpkin pie, I had a horrifying realisation. It suddenly occurred to me that there's been a bit of a theme running through my blog of late; that many of my posts are ‘sweet treats’; and that if you stumbled across The Secret Diary of a Kitchen Ninja, you could quite conceivably be convinced that we eat this kind of food all the time, and that it’s ok to do so.

That evening, it dawned on me that I may have unintentionally been misleading you all – fueling a false belief that as long as it’s paleo, it’s good for you.

Well folks, I hate to break it to you, but that’s not true. Treats are still treats, even if they’re ‘cleaner’ than their Neolithic counterparts. These paleo treats are usually sweetened (even if it is done using fruit, honey, or pure maple syrup, rather than refined sugar) and high in carbohydrates. They are not bad for you as such, but they should be occasional treats, eaten in small quantites…not whipped up every night and eaten in batch-loads!

Believe it or not, we don’t actually eat this kind of food very frequently. I guess I post the recipes because they seems more ‘special’ to me than the dishes I throw together every day. I don’t make them often, so they seem more exciting, and more likely to appeal to all of you. I need to change this.

This is the sort of food you should be eating every day;

the sort of food that fuels your body and your training.

This is real food:

From now on, I will endeavour to post more recipes for this kind of food, and just treat you, the readers, (and maybe myself!) to the occasional sweet treat.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Ok, I'm not American & I don't celebrate Thanksgiving...although I do think it's a pretty cool idea. But I do like the flavours of pumpkin pie - that mix of sweet (but not too sweet), savoury, and warm spices - so I made up a primal one a little while ago. I never got around to posting it though, so now seems as good a time as any! Unfortunately, I wrote down the ingredients but forgot to note down what I actually did with them, so I'll just have to do my best to remember...

Primal Pumpkin Pie

For the base
2C almond meal
1/2C dessicated coconut
25 dates
1 Tbsp almond butter
A dash of cold water

Combine all ingredients in a food processor until it forms a sticky dough. If it's too crumbly, add a little more water and mix again until you reach the right consistency.

Press dough into a greased flan tin (with removable base). Refrigerate until filling is ready.

For the filling

3C pumpkin, cooked & mashed
1C coconut cream
2 eggs
1 banana, mashed
1 ½ tsp mixed spice
1 ½ tsp ground cinnamon
½ tsp ground cardamom
1 tsp ground vanilla
2 tbsp pure maple syrup

1 Tbsp chia seeds

Beat all ingredients except the chia seeds together (I used a cake mixer for this), then stir in the chia seeds.

Chill for a while! (I would suggest at least an hour, so that the chia seeds absorb some of the moisture. Longer is better).

Once the filling has begun to thicken, pour into the base and cook at 180 degrees celcius. I think this took about 20-30 minutes, but you want the base to be golden and the filling to be set.

If you're feeling particularly naughty, this tastes great with cream whipped with maple syrup!

It also works well as little tartlets (using a muffin tin instead of a flan tin).

'Cos everyone loves a good tart!

I was going to write something inspiring (or at least attempt to), but I'm way too tired to inspire myself, let alone you lot too! These tarts were pretty inspired though...

Chili chocolate tarts

For the crust

(adapted slightly from this recipe)

1 C ground almonds

1 C dessicated coconut

¼ tsp ground vanilla pods

1 pinch of salt

½ tsp baking soda

¼ C coconut oil

1 tbsp honey (you could probably leave this out)

Combine dry ingredients in a bowl.

Melt oil and honey together in a saucepan. Add to dry ingredients and stir thoroughly.

Press a thin layer into greased (I used olive oil) muffin tins.

Bake at 180 degrees for approx 6 minutes, or until golden.

Leave to cool completely in tin.

For the filling

(also informed by the above recipe, but I didn't want to use chocolate, so I changed it up a bit...well, quite a lot...)

2 ripe bananas

1 ripe avocado

½ C cocoa

1 can coconut milk

¼ tsp vanilla extract

¼ tsp chili powder

1 tsp cinnamon

2 tbsp arrowroot

Combine bananas, avocado and cocoa in a food processor.

Heat coconut milk, vanilla extract, chili powder and cinnamon over low heat, stirring often, until boiling. Remove from heat and pour into bowl of cake mixer (or a mixing bowl, if you’re using a hand whisk). 

Add arrowroot and quickly whisk thoroughly (if you don’t do this quickly, you’ll get lumps). Add chocolate mixture and whisk again. 

Chill in the fridge for half an hour.

Once filling is chilled and crust is completely cool, pour filling into the tarts crusts then refrigerate (in the tin) until filling is completely set. These were actually best the next day.

When ready to serve, run a knife around the edge of each tart to loosen.

(I had lots of leftover filling, so you might want to double the crust recipe or halve the filling recipe. Alternatively, the filling works great as a stand-alone chocolate mousse!)

Chocolate Coconut Cupcakes

Cupcakes

1 C coconut flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp ground vanilla
6 eggs
¾ C coconut milk
2 tbsp coconut oil
100g 85% dark chocolate
1 tbsp raw honey

Combine dry ingredients, then whisk in eggs and coconut milk.

In a separate saucepan, over a low heat, melt together coconut oil, chocolate & honey. Stir frequently.

Whisk chocolate mixture into rest of ingredients.

Spoon into cupcake patties placed in a muffin tray (each should be about ¾ full). Bake at 180 degrees for 15 minutes, or until cupcake bounces back when lightly pressed.

Cool on a wire rack.

  

If you’re feeling particularly decadent (I was, obviously!), ice (using frosting recipe below) then top with toasted dessicated coconut. 

Chocolate butter cream frosting

100g butter, at room temperature

1 tbsp honey 

2 tbsp cocoa
Approx 3 ½ tbsp coconut milk

Whisk butter and honey together until butter begins to pale. Add in 1 tbsp cocoa & 1 tbsp coconut milk, then whisk again. Add in the other tbsp of cocoa & 2 tbsp of coconut milk. Whisk. If necessary, add extra coconut milk until it reaches a ‘frosting’ consistency (creamy but not runny).

Little pots of goodness!

These don't need words to go with them - they're awesome just as they are!

Ingredients

2 ripe avocados

3 small ripe bananas (or 2 normal size ones)

2 tbsp pure cocoa

2 tbsp honey

2 tsp chia seeds

1/2C very strong espresso (I used 4-5 heaped scoops in a plunger)

100g 85% dark chocolate (I kept aside a square to shave onto the top of the pots)

Blend all ingredients except chocolate in a food processor.

Melt chocolate over low heat (stirring constantly). Add to other ingredients and blend until fully combined.

Add extra cocoa and/or honey if necessary, to suit your tastes.

Spoon into fancy looking pots (I used glasses, but now, thanks to some wonderful friends of ours, I have the perfect little ramekins for next time!) and refrigerate.

To serve, top with toasted chopped almonds & chocolate shavings. You could also put a spoonful of whipped cream on top.

A love affair with food

Historically, my relationship with food has closely resembled a love affair - passion, excitement, indulgence...and the ensuing guilt. At times, food, or more specifically the emotions associated with food, has consumed me (and there I was thinking it was supposed to be the other way around?!).

But I'm on a mission to change that.

I've started by choosing a more appropriate, more reliable love interest (thank you, primal diet). I'm working on my commitment - trying to stay faithful to this new love; trying to reduce incidences of infidelity. And I'm investing quality time in the relationship. Bear & I have started doing an early CrossFit session on a Saturday, so that we can then spend the morning wandering around a farmers' market, finding fresh, organic, quality food for the week; and exploring the wonders (and meat specials!) of Nosh or Farros. With good ingredients on hand, I get even more pleasure from creating healthy, tasty, nourishing food. And I find myself spending more time cooking for enjoyment, rather than just because we need it.

Slowly, but surely, my relationship with food is improving. The passion and excitement are still there (and every now and then, so is the indulgence!), but the guilt is starting to fade into the background. At least, until those reckless moments of infidelity!

Next step is to reduce the frequency of those unsatisfying moments of weakness. And maybe replace them with something like this...

Avocado & lime sorbet (or Avocado, lime & pistachio tarts!)

Sorbet
4 ripe avocados
Juice and zest of 2-3 limes
1/2 tsp crushed chili (chili powder would probably be better, but I didn't have any!)
~2 tsp ground vanilla
1/4 tsp cinnamon
1 tbsp honey
1/2C pistachio kernels, chopped

Put all ingredients except the pistachios into a food processor and blend until combined. Stir in the pistachios (or you could add them into the food processor & just blend briefly).

Put mixture into the freezer for about 30 minutes. Remove and blend again. Repeat a couple more times, to get a creamier sorbet. (An icecream maker would probably be an awesome addition to my kitchen toys!)

This was really yummy, but I decided it might also be good as a pie filling. So I defrosted some of the sorbet and made it into...

Avocado, lime, & pistachio tarts

For the filling:
About 1/3 of the sorbet mixture (defrosted, if you froze it first)
3 eggs
~1/3 C coconut cream

Beat eggs and coconut cream together. Gently fold sorbet mixture into the egg/coconut cream mix.

For the base:
200g pistachio kernels
10 dates
1 tbsp honey
1 tbsp macadamia butter (or other nut butter)
Cold water

Put all ingredients except for the water into a food processor & combine. Remove mixture and place in a bowl. Mix in a small amount of cold water, so that it becomes a sticky-ish 'dough'. Refrigerate if you have time.

To make the tarts, take spoonfuls of the 'dough' and press into a muffin tin to create the bases (I put enough in so that the base went about halfway up the side). Spoon filling into each, then bake at 180 degrees for approximately 20 minutes, or until filling is set.

Cool for a few minutes in the tin, then remove onto a wire rack to cool.

If I'd had extra limes, I would have served this topped with lime zest. As it was, I just served them with a delicious 2007 Shingle Peak Late Harvest Riesling instead! ;-)

These also work well as mini tarts...

Happily ever after

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away...well actually, not far away at all, but that sounds better...there was a young (let me indulge myself here) woman who totally sucked at power cleans. She knew she sucked at power cleans - they just felt so wrong, so awkward, so...sucky! And because she knew she sucked at power cleans, she worked hard on her technique, she rehearsed it over and over again in her mind, she thought about every single part of the movement...in fact, she over-thought every single part of the movement...and yet she still sucked. And it didn't matter how many people told her she could do them, that the bar was going well high enough, that she really was capable of lifting heavier...she still sucked.

But then, one day, this young woman realised that she was sick of sucking at power cleans. She decided she didn't want to suck at them anymore. Instead, she decided that she was actually awesome at power cleans. Not going to be awesome, you understand; actually was awesome.

And lo and behold, she was.

She went into a workout that day and nailed 45 x 35kg power cleans.

Then, less than a week later, she knocked 2 minutes off her previous 'Grace' (30 clean and jerks) time.

And now she knows she's awesome at power cleans. And so she lived happily ever after.


So it just goes to show how much of what we do, in workouts and in life, comes down to mindset. Often, the outcome is already determined by our approach. We can choose to suck, or we can choose to be awesome - it's up to us.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying we can always choose what happens to us in life, but I do think we can choose how we respond. And we can always choose how we approach each day, each workout, each challenge.

We can choose to be processed-carbohydrate-laden, sugar-laden chocolate shell pudding (WTF?!?)...

...or we can choose to be primal-crumbly-goodness...

What will you choose today?


Apple, blueberry & dark chocolate crumble

2 cups almond meal
50g butter, softened & chopped

Ground mixed spice

Ground cinnamon
100g 85% dark chocolate, roughly chopped
1 cup pecans, chopped (hazelnuts would also be tasty)


Apples
Blueberries (frozen or fresh)
Ground mixed spice, cloves, and cinnamon


For the topping
Place the almond meal, spices, and chopped butter in a mixing bowl.

Using your fingers, rub the butter into the almond meal, until it looks a little like biscuit crumbs.

Stir in chopped chocolate and pecans.

For the crumble
Stew apples with some ground mixed spice, cloves, and cinnamon.

 Here's a little something I prepared earlier...

Place apples and blueberries in a baking dish.

Spread the topping evenly over the fruit mixture.

Bake at 180 degrees, until topping is golden and fruit is heated through (approximately 20-30 minutes).

Leave to stand for at least 10-15 minutes before serving (preferably with lots of cream!), although I would recommend baking in advance and serving cool.

Tastes even better the next day, cold and swimming in cream, after smashing 30 clean and jerks! Just like my 'Grace' performance, it improved with time...

How lucky?

You don’t need no fancy tricks
Painted eyes or glossy lips

I love you just the way you are
Hope you don’t mind my beat up car

You don’t need to change your dress
You don’t need to change your shoes

Don’t try to hide your natural looks
Forget about the cover let me read the book

Don’t get me wrong I like them heels
But the way I feel is the way I feel

You don’t need to change your dress
You don’t need to change your shoes

Go ahead be wild and free
you don’t have to shave yo’ legs for me.
…


(Shave Yo’ Legs by Keb’ Mo’)

My man loves me first thing in the morning, when my hair’s looking crazy and I probably have drool at the corner of my mouth. He loves me in my workout gear, when I’m a sweaty, red mess. He loves me when I rock make-up, a dress, and high heels. And he also loves me when I can’t be bothered putting on make-up or doing my hair. How lucky am I?

He gave me somewhere to stay (live…?!) when I found myself between houses. He got up to make me breakfast when I was running late for a course. He supports and encourages me in my endeavours. He's proud of me and doesn't mind people knowing it. How lucky am I?

Less than a week after we started dating, he already knew me well enough to buy me the BEST. CHRISTMAS. PRESENT. EVER…

(What? I really wanted one!)

And then when that wasn’t going to arrive in time, he bought me the second best Christmas present ever, based on a passing comment I made. A juicer. How lucky am I?

Bear. That’s how lucky. So this one’s for my Bear…

Date night cupcakes

We went on an awesome date night on Saturday night. We were going to go see a movie, but we got the time wrong, so we grabbed smoothies and headed up One Tree Hill. My smoothie was A.Mazing! Coconut, banana, honey and almond. Sooo good. These cupcakes were an attempt to replicate the flavours. They ended up more banana-y and less coconut-y than I intended, but they still taste pretty damn good!

Cupcakes
100g butter, softened
1/4C honey
2 eggs
1/2C almond meal
1/4C coconut flour
1/2C coconut cream
1 tsp baking soda
2 large bananas
1/4C almond butter

Icing
100g butter, softened
1 tbsp honey
2 tbsp almond butter

For the cupcakes
Beat butter and honey well, until butter turns pale.

Add eggs, one at a time, and beat slowly until just combined.

Add almond meal and coconut flour (1/4C at a time) alternating with coconut cream, stir with a wooden spoon after each addition. Add baking soda. Stir.

In a separate bowl, mash bananas and almond butter. Stir this into the cupcake mix.

Spoon mixture into cupcake cases (in a muffin pan). Bake at 180 degrees for 18-20 minutes.

Cool cupcakes for 5 minutes in pan before removing from pan and placing on a wire rack to cool completely.

For the icing
Beat ingredients together. Freeze or refrigerate to harden before icing cupcakes.

Once cupcakes are completely cool, ice. I suggest keeping them in the fridge so that the icing doesn't melt...if there happens to be any left!